Rain beat down my windshield, and red mud splattered my car as I drove through Monument Valley in October of 2009. The road was muddy but passable. The thought of returning to my campsite was daunting. It was a cold, hard rain, and I had myself and a large wet dog to care for.
Suddenly I was sobbing, I pulled off the road and I heard Mamacita (my spirit guide) say to me, “You don’t have to do it alone anymore. All your life you have done it alone, even when in a relationship you were alone. You always kept something back. It’s time now…it’s time.”
I had gone to Monument Valley with my dog, Cheyenne, a tent, sleeping bag, small cook stove, lantern and other basic supplies. I was prepared to stay twelve days, on a trip I had anticipated for months. I knew something waited in Monument Valley, I just wasn’t sure what that something was. While it was gorgeous during the day (sans the rain) at night it was colder than a well digger’s ass in January! Thankfully I had brought along a down comforter, which became my sleeping pad. Cheyenne gave me a look like only a dog can, one that said, “I love you Mom, but what were you thinking?”
I had bet my friend Jim $200.00 that I would make it the full twelve days. He insisted that I could survive the camping, but I would miss André too much and come home. It wasn’t so much a case of missing André, it was that I wanted to be with him and I knew in that moment through the tears, through the pain of aloneness that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. I surrendered to love.
What I know for you is that you don’t have to do it alone anymore either. The Truth is you are never alone, however, some days it’s hard to remember there is a loving, abundant, infinite, wise source larger than you. Of course this source is always available, but when you are in the middle of the tsunami, or drowning in a black hole, Source seems a long, long way off.
So you beg, you plead and bargain…”dear God if you will just ____________________ I will ___________________. Occasionally this seems to work (hopefully you express your gratitude) until the next desperate moment. The Truth is you are not alone-EVER! Source is always there of course and so are other people! And those other people are searching for you, to connect-to create-to grow through love. ‘Cause when we get down to the core, love is what it’s all about, isn’t it? Love – in the form of friends, family, even strangers who step up and help each other, even those in Spirit world.
After my recent women’s retreat I did a reading for my new friend Trish. Her husband Aron who had died two years ago, came through to talk to her. I’ll let Trish’s words tell the rest of the story:
“During BakeR’s reading, Aron gave me a huge bouquet of yellow daisies. Didn’t mean anything significant to me. Then I visited Aron’s marker at the National Cemetery for Veteran’s Day. Yep, in front of his marker, at least 24 bushes in full bloom, of . . . yellow daisies.” –Trish
This story gave me goose bumps and tears, and it reminded me how un-alone we truly are. Most people are not aware how many of their loved ones who have crossed over are still with them. You are never alone!
Remember if you are feeling alone, or if you’re living in pain, worry, frustration, anger or sadness, there is someone else who is feeling the same way. There are a myriad of ways to connect with them…find your support group whether it be one or forty four.
- Search the newspaper for a list of groups and ongoing events. GET UP AND GO!
- Check out Yahoo groups
- Go to a church, synagogue, temple, ashram etc. and connect with like minded people
- Create a prayer group or just find a prayer partner
- Talk honestly with your significant other, a family member or friend – tell them how you’re feeling
- Help someone else-just listen…this will return ten-fold.
- Check out self-help books from the library…read them…a few of my favorites
“Excuse Me Your Life Is Waiting” – Lynn Grabhorn
“Loving What Is” – Byron katie
“This Thing Called You” – Ernest Holmes (almost anything by Holmes)
“The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success” – Deepak Chopra (almost anything by Chopra)
“Anam Cara” – John O’Donohue
“Return To Love” – Marianne Williamson
Hafiz or Rumi’s poetry to put a smile on your face
- Sign up for Michael Dooley’s daily inspirational and fun thoughts of the day at www.tut.com
- Google inspirational quotes
- Sign up for an inspirational blog – mine or one of many others 😉
- Join a Choir
- Learn to dance
- Volunteer at a food bank, a shelter, an after school program, or become a tutor
- Borrow a kid for a fun day in the park
- Ask your face book friends to send you a positive thought or two (send them one too)
- Start a group with others who are going through “stuff”, meet weekly/monthly to discuss new possibilities. Stay out of the negative “story”
- Hang out at a local coffee shop and connect with some like-minded folks.
- Take your dog for a walk and meet some other dog owners
- Pet your cat
- See your psychic and connect with friends/family in spirit world… 😉
- Volunteer at the library, your local park or ranger station
- Share a Thanksgiving dinner with a neighbor or friend who’s alone, or celebrate with friends at a church dinner
Get up, Get going, Connect! Now more than ever is the time to reach out, to help one another, or to ask for help. Yes, I know we all hate to ask for help…but guess what? It’s time! If a neighbor, a friend or family member asked for help you would be happy to assist wouldn’t you? Then why are you so afraid to ask? I’m seeing more and more the necessity for all of us to reach out in whatever way we can. Mamacita says over and over again, there is no time to waste, we will all need each other in big ways. Share your good and ask if you need help.
What better time to start than the holidays…Thanksgiving is all about sharing…the Pilgrims and the Native Americans sharing crops, food and friendship…and we recreate this celebration yearly by sharing our bounty!
Let’s give Thanks for the abundance we have, share it and multiply it!
p.s. On my wedding day I handed Jim $200, best 200 bucks I ever lost, I guess you know I came home early!by
Whatcha gonna do with the 36 cents sticky with coke on your floorboard?
When a woman on the street is huddled in the cold on a sidewalk vent trying to keep warm.
Do you call her over, hand her the change, ask her story, ask her name
Or do you tell yourself, you’re just a fool, a fool to believe you can change the world…
The other night André, my wonderful husband, reminded me that when I heal myself – I heal the world. Yep, you see I/we believe that God/Spirit/Love, whatever you call the Universal essence is all there is. Therefore, if Spirit is all there is, then it follows that we are Spirit – right here, right now manifesting in physical form. When we heal ourselves, that healing spirals out in big waves of love and heals all that it touches.
A fine example of this type of healing is being done October 8th at Angel Valley Retreat Center.
Angel Valley is where James Ray held his now infamous retreat last October which concluded with a sweat lodge. Yes, that sweat lodge! The sweat lodge that ended in tragedy for the families and friends of the three people who transitioned that night.
Michael and Amayra Hamilton the owners of Angel Valley have chosen to create a beautiful, sacred space, a memorial to honor those who passed a year ago. Above is a picture of the beautiful heart that was created from the river rocks used in the sweat lodge ceremony. Large crystals represent those who passed, surrounded by those who have known and loved them. Trees have been planted to symbolize new life.
Here is part of Angel Valley’s invitation:
At the same time we want to focus on how we make the next step. We have learned from the experience. We have grown. For many it has been a process of tremendous transformation, of getting a deeper understanding about life and death and a more profound appreciation for the preciousness of life. Therefore the ceremony will be a celebration of life.
On the occasion, what we have so far called the Memorial Site will be officially renamed The Garden of Transformation
I honor Michael and Amayra for what they are doing to heal the energy field, the Earth and the families and friends of Kirby Brown, James Shore and Liz Newman. I’m not here to judge the people involved or guess why it happened or if it could have been prevented. I am standing with Angel Valley in moving forward to heal their trauma, to heal all those involved and to heal all people. They are moving forward with love, grace and forgiveness. This Friday, the celebration of life ceremony will include meditation, prayers, poetry and music. All the families, friends and community have been invited.
This is one of those healings that has the potential to heal the planet, shifting the grief and anger to love and forgiveness. Not running away from the pain, but facing it, owning it and then taking the necessary steps to heal.
Where in your life is there something hanging out that you haven’t healed?
Take a moment to go inside – sit in silence or with quiet music. Ask who or what you need to forgive. You may be surprised what comes up (I was, when a woman from 20 yrs. ago came up – I thought I was done with that chapter). Whatever feelings come, allow yourself to be with them. You may experience anger, grief, fear, pain, frustration, disbelief, sadness – just allow yourself to feel it. If need be journal about your pain, let it all out. You can be as vicious as needed, purge it, get it out of you, rip it up and burn it. Now that you’re done with that – forgive them and forgive yourself.
When faced with this pain you may wonder how you could possibly forgive. As I told a client yesterday you just do it! Remember:
When you release the wrongdoer from the wrong, you cut a malignant tumor out of your inner life.
You set a prisoner free, but you discover that the real prisoner was yourself.
–Lewis B. Smedes
The person who wronged you has most likely moved on, maybe not remembering the incident at all. While you are still held prisoner.
It is your choice now – right now to heal or not. What’s it going to be? You really can decide to release this right now. You really can decide to heal – yourself and the energy field that we all rely on. Pigs were born to wallow in garbage not you! You are big enough, couragous enough and strong enough to cut that tumor out now.
p.s. Don’t forget to forgive yourself for carrying it this long! Feel better don’t you????
Want to feel better on a continual basis?
Call me now to schedule your FREE 30-minute coaching session or call 602.999.2493.
Mamacita has been playing in my brain lately, so I decided to give her the forum today! Her words seem so simple, and yet the Truth always is.
Mamacita, what changes are coming?
Energetic, there is a shift happening. You are moving into the feminine energies – loving, caring, compassion, grace, forgiveness. And yes, there is still a warrior Spirit if needed – witness a mother bear protecting her cubs. But women will never send their son/daughters off to a needless war.
How can we survive these changes?
Love, Love and more love! No matter what happens – ask, “What would Love do now?” And forgiveness – you must learn to forgive quickly. Remember most people attack out of fear – FEAR – false emotions appearing real. Separate the person from the action and forgive them to the core of their being. That core, that essence of Spirit that is perfect, whole and complete.
What should we do now?
Move powerfully into Truth, in every phase of your life. Be authentic, live in integrity, be bold and courageous in your Truth. There is no more time for hiding who you really are. There is no more time to waste in a life of misery, pain and suffering. You are here to live in joy, in love, in truth.
Mamacita, this is nothing new, don’t you have some profound words of wisdom for us?
LOVE IS PROFOUND! Especially in the face of conceived evil. But since you need a little more help here are a few more words of wisdom:
* Gratitude – be grateful for all you have right now
* Faith – put your faith in Spirit not in fear
* Grace – allow grace to permeate all you do
* Inspire – inspire another person today, show them love, show them joy, show them courage. Remember what you give – you receive.
* Light – a tiny candle can illuminate the dark
* Courage – Walk your Talk!
I ask you, “Has Spirit ever let you down? Really???” Go in Love.
Mamacita, is there anything else?
Yes, you know I invented the acronym, KISS – keep it simple sweetie. It is really simple; if you want to live in joy – be joyous. If you want to be loved – love. If you want to be abundant – be grateful. If you want to be courageous – leap and the net will appear. If you want to live – get up every morning and greet the day with a big kiss! I LOVE YOU!
Thank you Mamacita! Anytime, de nada!by
What can I say about change that hasn’t already been said? Yep, it’s inevitable–just like the sun coming up today.
My Mama used to say, “This too shall pass”, which is great when times are tough and we’re up the proverbial creek without a paddle. ( I used to always tell her to pray anyway!) Honestly though haven’t you always made it through? Right! You did or you wouldn’t be here. So why does change scare us so much? What is it about change that makes some of us sweat like pigs (have you ever actually seen a pig sweat?), quake in our boots or have nightmares of epic proportions?
I had a small challenge with change while visiting our friends James and MaryAnne in Ottawa, Canada last week. James as you may recall if you’ve perused my website is a demanding hike leader and my grappeling coach. He took a day off to lead us on a hike as only James can do! It was a gorgeous day–we were very spontaneous–stopping to see these beautiful rock sculptures along the river, visiting Andre’s first home and then finally arriving at the trailhead.
I had asked James to make it an easy hike because André had hurt his hip and I figured there was no reason to make it worse.
As we climbed two sets of steep stairs, sheer granite rock faces occasionally with just hand and foot holds and then pulled ourselves up a rope on another steep rock face, I became angrier and angrier. Mother Bear came out and wanted to protect her husband from any more pain or discomfort…the night before he was moaning in his sleep from the pain! When we finally reached the top of that gosh darn mountain, I knew that I had to get the anger out into the light, so I could move on and not spoil my day. I spoke my truth, hopefuly without blame or judgment–following Angeles Arrien’s wisdom. James, bless him, listened lovingly and explained that this was an easy hike. What the heck? This was an easy hike? We just pulled ourselves up a rope over a steep rock face and climbed sheer granite where there were maybe 2″ ledges to grip with our boots and 1/2-1″ handholds….EASY?
Mary Anne wisely stated that maybe we should have confirmed before leaving what an easy hike was. It turns out that the hike I would have probably rated a seven, James and the others would have rated a three. WOW, we were just slightly out of sync on this communication. Once I spoke my truth and James explained his take, my anger dissipated, all was forgiven and we continued down the mountain to a gorgeous, cool waterfall with little ponds to play in. If I hadn’t released the anger I could have seethed and stressed the rest of the day. James , rightly so, would have probably trotted my sorry butt back down the mountain and I would have missed the waterfall, splashing in the pond, and the beautiful boulder hopping hike following the creek down the other side. Not exactly the hike I had in mind, but an incredible adventure when I was willing to embrace the “change”, oh yeah and let go of the idea that I needed to protect André.
My lessons from this “change” were multi-level:
- Ask for clarification when going on a hike with the Master.
- Speak your truth without blame or judgment . –Angeles Arrien
- Anger brought into the light cannot subsist.
- The change I fear may turn out great – it was an awesome hike and afterward André actually felt better .
What “change” are you facing this week? If it seems unclear ask for clarity. If your fear rises up and becomes anger, frustration or turmoil bring it to the light. Talk about your fear and express your anger, always coming from a place of love. Brainstorm the positive possibilities that could come with this change. Allow the brainstorming to be as farfetched and crazy as you can imagine, along with rational, logical ideas. Explore the possibilities, allow yourself to imagine an incredible new adventure, full of magic, full of joy, and just maybe with a waterfall at the end!
Have a life changing week!
Many blessings, BakeR
And remember if you need support I offer a FREE 30 min. coaching session!
Contact me now.
And speaking of change here’s a great video by Carrie Underwood that I had never heard….yes, it’s true I don’t watch television!
Is there some BOLD, VIBRANT, OR OUTRAGEOUS deed you can’t wait to try?
Maybe you want to:
- Become a politician
- Start a new business – make your own economy!
- Become a clown
- Write a book
- Go back to school
- Start a new career
- Sail around the world
- Start a Drum Circle (this may be mine, anyone interested?)
- Teach kids of any age how to dance, sing, create, grow, stand on their heads
- Create a community garden
The world is waiting for you — but it won’t wait for long — trust me, there is someone right behind you ready to step into your place. There are millions of people who have taken their creative ideas and made something of them. Right now in Africa or Afghanistan or the United States there is a woman or man who has decided enough is enough and they are going to make the changes necessary to live their dream.
Marianne Williamson told us, “Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do.” She continues, “And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.”
Tomorrow you will be one day older, without having lived your dream! The time is now — maybe 2012 really will be catastrophic — do you want to die without ever having done IT, whatever IT is?
Remember what fear is?
False Emotions Appearing Real
- What is holding me back? The usual excuses are lack of time or money, but the Truth is — underlying all that is FEAR.
- What do I want to bring to my life? What is the purpose for creating something new in my life? Maybe you want to create excitement, adventure, peace, love, friends, fulfillment, success, joy, giving, passion, gratitude, you fill in the blank.
- How much fulfillment, joy, passion, etc. am I REALLY willing to experience?
- Acknowledge what is great and wonderful in your life.
- List all your talents that will support the NEW you.
- Be grateful for all the good – what riches do you already possess?
Consider the gift you want to give your children, friends and family. When you step out in a Big way and make it happen, you inspire those around you to do and be anything they desire. With your shining example You inspire them to dream big and go for it!
Making yourself small serves no one, PLAY BIG! WHEN YOU EMPOWER YOURSELF, YOU EMPOWER EVERYONE AROUND YOU!
I know you are ready to PLAY BIG!
I am ready to coach you!
Let me introduce myself…
It seems that all my life I have colored outside the lines — sometimes it’s fun and sometimes it’s scary. This is why I can attune to your needs; I have been there and back! I too have had those days when I wondered who I was, where I was going and what it all means anyway. I have felt the pain and the ecstasy.
Just prior to turning 40, when my partner was dying of lung cancer I started having flashbacks of being raped. At first it was flashbacks of being raped by two men, which I consciously remembered as being beaten up by them, but not raped. But then I was having flashbacks of my father’s sexual abuse. I had done a great job of disassociating as a child and again as an adult…going out of body to escape the horror of what was going on.
Ten years of intense therapy ranging from psychodrama to holistic breath-work to traditional therapy ensued. Along this path I came to the freedom of forgiveness — for myself, my father and even for the men who raped me. I learned that anger and rage kept me the victim. Removing the anger was like cutting out a tumor that was eating me alive…Love was the answer, self-love first and foremost, then love for others.
This gave me compassion and an incredible insight into people’s inner worlds. I can help you go into the dark and bring forth the light. And, if your world is already light, wouldn’t you like to create more? I would like you to experience and open to deep abiding love for yourself and others, to know the profound freedom and joy that come from this Love. Together we can shape-shift your world and create a new paradigm!
I work with you through intuitive work, spiritual life coaching, and empowering workshops.
You bring your willingness to open and expand on all levels, your inner wisdom and creativity and most of all your desire to move forward!
Now I would like to gently yet firmly help guide you to a rich, vibrant life!
GET OUT OF YOUR OWN WAY, STEP INTO LOVE AND LET GO
As I embark on this new journey the question has been, “Will people accept me in this new role, will they be warm and fuzzy or will they be cold and serpent like? The answer of course is I have to follow my heart and follow Spirit.
Fear is what keeps me separate from you, if I let my fear control me then I will not reach out to you. I will not tell the world what I’m doing and I will continue to hide my light under the basket. I will not be able to love and support you if I continue to hide. And what I choose to do now is love and support you!
Just as I chose to step into this “snake pit”, I choose now to step into my true essence, yes it’s scary, yes sometimes it seems too big and I wonder what makes me so sure I can do this. But the Truth is I can’t do anything else now, I have chosen a new life and dammit I know it is the right thing. This trip to Peru working with Shamans in the Amazonian jungle and Andes Mountains was among the scariest 24 days of my life, but I came out a new person, ready to make this transformation, and indeed I could not deny the calling any longer.
Sometimes it’s necessary to get out of our own way. When we want to create or manifest something , WHO is in the way? Oh yeah baby, there’s three fingers pointing right back at you and me! Yep, it’s true, I’m the one who doesn’t think it’s possible, who comes up with a myriad of reasons why it won’t work, who fears the worst. What is the worst anyway? In my imagination the worst is I fail, lose everything, end up on the street – or in the woods in my case, with nothing and no one. Is this really possible – wow I think not! I’ve failed before, didn’t kill me, here I am in Sedona, living a great life. So what’s really in the way – FEAR!!! When I’m in FEAR, love does not exist. I’m certainly not loving myself when I’m in FEAR. I know that what I think, what I believe is what I will create, therefore if I continue with these negative thoughts, guess what I’m creating? Yes, that’s right, more icky, yucky crap. If I’m putting my faith in fear, then I’m certainly not putting my faith in Love/God/Spirit. Putting faith in fear happens when I let the fear monster take over my thoughts, when I put more credence in my fears than in Spirit’s ability to walk me through them. When I step out of Love and into Fear!
- I challenge you to think back about some situation, event or disaster in your life. Reenact the fear and worry…now tell me if the worry, the agony, the fear really changed anything. Did it free you up to act or did it paralyze you and hold you hostage?
- At some point were you able to let go of the fear? Did you surrender? What happened then?
My guess is when you stepped out of Fear, you were able to act, you made conscious decisions and moved forward. I remember the bus trip down the mountain in the Andes, hairpin curves, a creaky old bus, pouring rain in an intense thunder and lightning storm. I was terrified and the voice said, “I have brought you through all this, why would I let you die now? You have things to do.” I surrendered, relaxed and enjoyed one of the most stunning storms I had ever witnessed. The lightning was magnificent at that altitude!
When I put my faith in fear, then my prayers sound like this: Dear God, please help me, if you take care of this I will do/or not do_________ everyday I swear!!!
When I choose to step into Love, when I choose to put my faith in Love, my affirmative prayer now sounds like this: I know that God/Love is all there is. I am what God is, there is no separation. I hereby claim Love in everything I do, I come from Love in every situation, I put my faith in Love. I release these words into Universal Law. And so it is! Granted this is a simplified version but actually it’s all we have to do. I’ve used this simple version when witnessing an accident to send protection and love. You CAN choose to step into Love and out of Fear right now. Give up your addiction to worry and fear….choose Joy and Love instead!
Create a great week fortyfour times!
Many blessings! BakeR
Contact me now to schedule an Intuitive session or your FREE 30 minute Spiritual Life Coaching Session!by
My very first blog will be unusual in it’s content but I just have to tell you that David Sunfellow of Sunfellow Productions has been amazing to work with. David took my meager ideas for a logo, website and brochure and created gorgeous (IMHO) print and web media. He knew what I wanted better than I did! And as if this isn’t enough he can also do a photo shoot for you if needed for your brochures, website, etc. You can view and purchase his fine art photography here.
Fast, easy to work with, very well priced and beautiful work…what more could you ask for?